Bayes Theorem T-shirt
by Kiwi
(Doylestown, PA, USA)
Bayes Theorem T-shirt
(Zazzle)
It strikes me that Bayes’ Theorem has an extraordinarily profound (and hitherto untapped) realm of possibility in the professional sports arena.
Seems a bit obscure, at first glance, I’ll grant you, but just stick with me here for a moment.
What’s the classic Bayes’ Theorem example? That’s right – if I get a positive drug test, what’s the likelihood of it being a false positive? See, now you’re with me, right...
Look, all a football player has to do is be able to rattle off something vaguely coherent about conditional probabilities, throw in the odd random "prior probability" and "conditional probability of B given A" and you’re golden.
The lazy sportsman may decide to get in a statistics grad student on his payroll at his drug policy board hearing, but I recommend against that.
Firstly, the grad student will be overwhelmed by the weighty presence of your illustrious self and therefore go completely to pieces, and secondly, if a pro footballer can sound even halfway knowledgeable about this, they’ll be stunned by your educational achievement and let you go without demur.
And as your final defense, wear this Bayes Theorem T-shirt, point to the logo, and say, quite simply, "QED."
Of course, should you get really stuck, take in this Quick Fix 4.2 Synthetic Urine
to replace your own specimen and you'll also be golden...